Precarious Burst
by AXENATOR
Summary: [RxS]Riku is sent to pick Sora up so that he can get to Japan and Kairi safely.But with Riku hidding secrets from Sora, the trip becomes difficult for both of them.Getting to their destination could end up in a disaster.
1. Chapter 1

Okay so after letting this sit on my computer for like...since the middle of my first story, I finally figured out a title for it. Oh yes, It's such an interesting title. Precarious can mean: dangerously lacking in security or stability. Burst in my story means: To come open or fly apart suddenly or violently, especially from internal pressure. Thank you for that. :D Okay so let's go to the disclaimer...

Disclaimer: This is the first chapter so it shall be formal. I do not own any of the characters or the game Kingdom Hearts. It belongs to Square and Disney.

Warning: My beta was being annoying while reading this and I didn't really re-read what I wrote. heh heh. ANd it's another AU. I sooo promise that when I think of a title for my non-AU Riku fic, I will get up the first chapter hehe. Oh yeah, and this starts in Sora's POV because I thought I was going to write it like that, but I remember I wanted to try Riku. So, if this is a Riku-centric fic... and we remember what the title means... I wonder what's going to happen? x)

* * *

Today was the day I was going to go to Japan for about the billionth time. I don't get how I was able to stand it, but I guess when Kairi is on the other side of the world, I gotta visit her the same amount of times she comes over here. At least it's free, being that she's probably richer than Bill Gates for reasons I don't know. What exactly do her parents do?

I kicked my legs back and forth under the bench as I sat waiting for the bus. Kairi had told me that one of her friends would come this time to make sure I didn't get lost on the way in the airport again. I swear, the signs in the airport are all wrong, it wasn't my fault. I felt kind of excited to meet someone born and raised in Japan, Kairi was born here and then her parents moved half way around the world and she had to follow. Although, I had meet plenty of other foreign exchange students, but most of the time they would be scared away by Leon with his Mr. Sunshine attitude towards everyone. Cloud has numerously asked him to stop scowling at everyone who asked him for directions but he would always receive a grunt in return. From what Kairi told me, Leon and Cloud had already gotten to Japan for our little reunion of the gang. Of course, I knew that even if I had asked, Leon and Cloud wouldn't have let me come with them, and neither did I want to. All that makey outy stuff made me gag.

The bus finally pulled up in front of me and I heard the bus driver say a polite goodbye and then this guy came off the bus. He had this silver hair that was perfectly cut just a little lower than his shoulders, and he had on these baggy jeans with lots of belts and chains on it. He wore a sweater that was about two sizes too big for him with the guy from the Crow on it. It said "They're all dead. They just don't know it yet." He had on black eye liner and fingerless gloves. I guess he must have had some contact with American kids; I don't know if there are really 'gothic' Japanese kids.

"Sora?" I looked up at him. Wow, that must be the hottest accent in the world.

"Yes?" I answered and I stood up to shake his hand. Wait, the Japanese people bow, right. I made some umming sounds and I started to try to figure out how to bow, Kairi told me something about how you were supposed to bow a certain way... or something... this was a part of the phone conversation I wasn't listening to because my character was dying in World of Warcraft and I needed to yell at my team for not healing me.

"It's okay." He smiled and he stuck out his hand as I had originally done.

"Okay!" I grinned, relieved, and shook his hand. "What's your name dude?" I asked as I stepped back. He looked like he was thinking and then answered with 'Riku.' That is one sexy name.

"So, Riku, ready to go back on a plane to get me safe and sound to Japan?" I grinned.

"Yeah, do you have your things?" He asked. What's with this polite stuff?

"Yeah, but dude, lighten up a bit. This is America now, you don't have to be all nice and stuff." He just smirked at me.

"Good. Kairi asked me to be nice to ya, and I was planning on it if you were some nerdy American boy. But I guess I was wrong about the nerdy part," he answered and he looked me up and down. Yeah, I wasn't nerdy, I had muscles!

"Dead wrong." I smirked back at him. I wonder if there was any muscle under all that fluff of clothes. "Well let's go!"

* * *

POV change to... I wonder who? x

* * *

I didn't think Sora would be a guy. Kairi never told me that, she just said to pick up her friend Sora at the bus stop. So I thought it would be easy then, taking someone to see her since I am gay. But a guy, that's another story. That made my 'problem' worse, because I knew that he was Kairi's boyfriend.

We got in the taxi that Sora had called to take us to the airport because the bus wouldn't have come back for another hour. He got in the taxi first before I could, making him just out of my eyesight as he sat to the left of me. I tried not to seem strange as I twisted so I sat with my body facing him, sideways on the seat. He gave me a wide look and I felt the 20 questions coming.

"So, why are you so American like?" He asked as he glanced at me from the corner of his eye and then back to looking forward.

"My dad is American. I learned English and came to America often when I was little." I answered. He nodded his head and he brought his arm up to stretch his hands up, placing his palms on the top of the taxi before letting them fall. He did have very well toned muscles hidden under that loose white T-shirt of his. He had on casual khaki shorts and regular sneakers. I felt his eyes land on me as he realized I was looking him over again and turned my face to the right. The car ride was in silence. I didn't want to talk and I guess he was just anxious to get on the plane and get to his girlfriend. I scowled and then felt really stupid because he was probably raising an eyebrow at me. _Moron, he probably thinks your crazy now._ I frowned at the little voice in my head and then mentally slapped myself for making more facial expressions to make myself look weird. _Real smooth stupid. _Shut up, I told the little face and I heard the laughing in my head but it went away.

The taxi stopped and I realized we were at the airport, and it was hailing and snowing outside. Weird, the weather man said it would be sunny today. Oh wait, since when are they ever right? I sighed and got out of the car and slammed the door shut. Sora had already gotten halfway to the doors of the airport with his luggage and I ran to catch up with him. When we got inside, the airport was crowded, and I felt the panic start to wave over me. I didn't like crowds, I didn't like tight spaces. I followed my way through the crowd, trying to kept up with Sora and keep my breathing even as so many people started to bump into me. He had stopped at a desk and as soon as I got there he turned around to talk to me.

"Walking too fast for you?" he grinned and I scowled.

"No," I took a deep breath to try to calm myself.

"So are you going to help me get around?" he asked and I felt my heart sink. I thought he knew this airport, so I had only spent time memorizing the one in Japan. I felt like a ton of weight just landed on my shoulders and I nodded, hoping that he would find what was needed and I didn't have to be blamed for it.

So we started to walk around the airport, and I looked from sign to sign, trying to recognize anything. Twice Sora told me that I was going the wrong way, making me sink deeper into my hole. _Are you that blind? _The voice snickered and I instantly snapped at it to stop bothering me but it kept going. _Can you read that sign over there? Or is that too hard for you too? Sora's yelling at you again, he's giving you that look. Aggravating isn't it? _I tried to block it out of my mind but it wasn't working. And then I lost Sora.

"Sora?" I turned to my right and couldn't see him. "Sora?" Something grabbed my shoulder and I tensed before turning all the way back to the left to see Sora giving me another look like I was mentally retarded or something.

"Are you leading me or what?" He asked in an annoyed tone and the voice laughed at me. I felt the air around me start to get tighter, and I panicked. My body felt like it was being crushed under a ton of weight and I froze like a deer in headlights.

"Riku?" I heard something distant say.

"I have to go to the bathroom." And then I ran as fast away from him as possible, and only found the restroom by the familiar sign above it.

* * *

I slid my glove carefully back onto my arms and then slid my sweater sleeve down. I stared at myself in the mirror and sighed. Lucky no one was in here.

"Riku!" The door slammed open to reveal a very angry looking Sora. Shit. _Making more problems it seems? _I felt like it would happen again but Sora's face softened a little for a reason I didn't understand. _He sees your pitiful expression, he feels bad that you're so pathetic. _

"Are you okay?" He asked, walking towards me. I took a step back automatically and he stopped walking. I nodded slightly, but he still had the same face on.

"The planes can't take off because of the blizzard. They can't see anything and the hail is too much." He paused as if I knew what that meant. "We can't go today. We should head back to my house." Then he chuckled. "Or attempt to get back to my house." I forced a fake smile and nodded. _Silly boy, where's your luggage?_

Shit." I said almost inaudibly but Sora heard me.

"My luggage."

"Oh, I have it." He said and I saw that he indeed, was holding two suitcases. _Haha, you can't even keep track of your luggage. _I willed the voice to go away as I took my suitcase from him.

"Okay, let's go."

* * *

So... the voices in Riku's head... don't ask. And so... how do we like my lovely version of emo Riku? Hehe, I love him! I wanted to write a angst filled Riku fic because can't you see him being depressed? I mean he didn't even get to be in the FMV ending of Kingdom Hearts! Well, that and other things, but Riku has a reason for being depressed in my story. And so far what I got in my mind is a good reason. Funny how I decide to post this right after I watched the movie Manic... hmm...

By the time the non-AU riku fic gets out, KH2 will be out and it will be weird 'cause then we would all know what happens to him. Sigh. Oh well, I like chapter one of it so far.

As always, **review** and constructive critism! I hope this chapter turned otu like I wanted it to...but I doubt it did. Everything that seems so perfect in my mind falls to pieces when I write it.

So go _Review_, make me happy, and...go read some more RikuxSora fics, or the rare and elusive LeonxCloud ones lol.


	2. Chapter 2

I noticed that...when I write the title as PB, its like...Peanut Butter. Thats my favortie food. hehe.  
Thank you to all that reviewed! It made me really happy! Sorry it took so long to get this one out because I have two projects to do and my other computer is being stupid so...the next update my be after my projectsare done in a week.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything In Kingdom Hearts. They belong to Square and Disney. I also don't own teh MCR song "I'm not Okay." Don't ask why it's in there... at the moment I was writing that part I was listening to it and I felt like putting it in the sory. Ehehe.

Warning: Okay, this whole time I've been worried about how I was writing Riku. So I was kind of writing a bit differently. So if at any part of the story the writing kind of changes it's because I finally had enough of it and decided to write it without caring. It made it much easier to get thoughts out. That's why some parts in the beginning I think are crappy because I was ttoo busy trying to think of how to write Riku.

Well that's enough! On with it!

* * *

After finally getting a taxi that seemed to have like super iron roof top so the hail couldn't get through, we made it to Sora's apartment. It was pretty big for something that was normally so small. I wonder what his job is since he seemed to have been able to furnish it with enough stuff.

The kitchen was nice and cozy like, with a table with four chairs and a living room with a good sized TV, couch and a reclining chair. He had small bedroom and one full sized bathroom. There was a lot of blue in his house.

"What are you doing?" He asked as I set my suitcase down next to the couch.

"I'm sleeping on the couch right?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Guests can sleep in the bed." He said and took my suitcase into the bedroom without giving me time to protest. When he came back he sat down on the couch and turned on the TV. "But you can go get a can of orange soda from the fridge for me. And one for yourself too." I nodded and went back into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. I stared at the cans, and picked out the two orange colored ones and went back to him. I gave him one and sat down to the left of him on the couch. He started to flip through the channels and finally landed on some music channel that had letters on the bottom of the screen. I knew that he was reading it because his eyes would dart back and forth to read the scrolling messages. I stared at them but only could understand the letters. _Feeling left out?_ I scowled and I saw his eyes glance at me. _Smooth._

Oh, why don't I make dinner or something," he said like he was kind of talking to me and also himself as he got up. "Come on, I can't do it myself. I'm pretty bad at cooking." He laughed and I forced one. I wasn't that good at it either. He got out a pot and started to search through the cabinets. "Wanna hand me the chicken?" I nodded and went to the freezer and opened it up. I looked inside to see a couple of packages and then saw two that looked the same. I went to grab one, but then noticed the letters on them were different. I stared at them intently, trying to figure out the words on them. Tur...key... I squinted my eyes in thought and then I saw a hand reach in and grab the one next to the package I had been pondering over. I jumped slightly in surprise but he didn't seem to notice.

"What, you can't read?" he asked in a half joking voice. _Yeah, he's stupid. _Shut up, it's not my fault. I shuffled over to him and pulled out the strainer that I found in one of the draws because I saw he had taken out macaroni. I put it on the counter and looked around to see if there was anything else I could do. But Sora had it all under control and eventually I got so upset at the fact that I seemed to just get in the way the voice started to get louder and louder and the room was getting smaller and smaller.

"I have to use the bathroom." I said kind of quickly and rushed to my bag. I grabbed something out of it and closed the door behind me on the way in.

* * *

"Riku...where are you?" I heard Sora's voice and I pulled down my sweater sleeves.

"Coming!" I opened the door and met a very confused looking Sora.

"Not feeling well?" he asked.

"Yeah, something like that." I answered and smelt something very yummy. He grinned at me and I followed him back into the kitchen.

I sat down and looked at the practically feast he had in front of us. He made a lot of spaghetti, macaroni and meatballs. I felt kind of guilty, knowing that I probably wouldn't eat a lot like usual and it would most likely insult him. So we said our thanks and he started to eat. We ate in silence, the only thing I heard was my chewing and the nagging voice in my head I was attempting to push aside.

"Riku, how do you-" He started and then his phone went off. It was an interesting phone, it's ring was kind of like... a techno dance song but it had singing in it. So it was a singing phone which slightly disturbed me but he sighed and got up to pick it up.

"Hello." He answered in English which made me slightly upset that this conversation would be limited.

"Woah hold up. What about Mr. Sunshine?" He asked and his face got serious. "Cloud, forget it, you know how he is." He groaned. "He's always depressed, leave him alone to cry and he'll get better." Sora rolled his eyes and glanced in my direction. "He's right here, the planes can't take off. Look, I'll call you tomorrow okay?" And with that he hung up the phone without hearing a goodbye. He sat back down at the table and looked at me. I shifted in my seat and started to move the food on my place in circles.

"Riku, how do you know Kairi?" He asked.

"School."

"Really?" I wonder what he's trying to get at...

"Yeah. When she first saw me she said 'you're so emo, you shoot spider webs out your nose.'" He raised an eyebrow, not knowing if I was serious or not I guess. I sighed as I looked at my plate. I had arranged the meatballs and macaroni into a lovely picture that the guidance counselors would have a field day with. I quickly mixed it up and looked back up at him.

"I'm done." I said and grabbed my plate.

"I'll clean up, don't worry." He said and he shot out of his chair. "Go watch TV or something." I nodded slightly and left the room.

Sitting on the couch, I felt myself sag into it. I sighed and turned on the TV to nothing to interesting and I finally stopped on a cartoon with a blonde guy trying to get chicks get failing. I guess it was funny.

Sora sat down on the other side of the couch, luckily I had remembered to sit on the left so I could see him this time.

"You play DDR?" I stared at him. Was he crazy? Of course I played that! I must say I'm pretty good at it...perhaps that's the only thing I am good at. I nodded and I got up and he pulled out the Playstation 2 and the mats. I quickly grabbed the mat on the left, also because it was the mat I liked better. After giving me a weird look, he turned it on and we started to play.

* * *

After collapsing onto the couch I looked at the clock. 1:07. I panted as Sora still stood on the mat, glistening with sweat. I mentally took of note of this image and stored it away for sometime in the near future when I will become depressed.

"Another round?" Sora grinned but obviously didn't have the power to go again. I suddenly realized I was having fun. I was having fun without doing... other things. The voice hadn't been around for the whole time either. I felt a small smile tug at my lips as Sora flopped down on the couch.

"Bedtime I suppose," he then yawned really loud and instantly collapsed to the side.

"Sora?" I looked at him, moving a bit farther to the left, afraid to touch him. Sora didn't move and I watched as he rolled off the couch in a heap and then he started to snore. Right, so, that was interesting. I got up from the couch and after trying about 5 of the different remotes I got the TV to turn off. I think that's what I'll do to try to take my mind off of things, create a giant master remote that does everything. That way I don't have to worry about accidentally breaking one in my anger of none of them working.

_Because you would definitely break one._ I scowled at the voice 'Go away, go away, go away...' I walked into the bedroom that Sora told me that I had to use and pulled out my CD player. 'This will teach you.' I pulled the headphones on and turned the volume all the way up as I threw myself on the bed.

But it didn't make a difference. It never did. I could still hear it louder than my music as I pulled the pillow over my head.

What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems  
(I'm not okay)  
I've told you time and time again  
You sing the words but don't know what it means  
To be a joke and look  
Another line without a hook  
I held you close as we both shook for the last time  
Take a good hard look

_-nothing but a big loser. You have no real friends, that's why you had fun playing with this totally stranger. He's only trying to be nice, but he really hates you. You're-_

I'm not okay  
I'm not okay  
I'm not okay  
You wear me out

* * *

Poke. "Riku?" I rolled over and pulled the blanket over my head. I have a headache, go away. Poke. "Rikuuu..." Poke. Poke...poke, poke, poke, poke poke-

"STOP THAT!" I grabbed the pillow from under my head and slammed it over my assailant's head. It exploded into a bunch of feathers that through them I saw a annoyed looking brunette. Oops.

"Well," He started, his eyes narrowing slightly. "I came to tell you breakfast was ready, but you won't be getting any." I crawled off the bed and went out the door._ Good Job stupid. Just destroy his stuff. I'm sure that's the perfect way to win him over._ I groaned and fell back on the bed and pulled the other intact pillow over my face. It's too early for this.

_So are you going to leave the room a mess? I'm sure he'll like that. Along with you not eating his nicely prepared food. Today just isn't your day is it porky?_

No it's not." I groaned and pulled the headphones off my head and threw them at my open back. They fell on the floor and the top part broke in half. I need new tape. "And I'm not fat." I snapped and heard it chuckle at my delayed reaction as I shuffled towards my bag, grabbed the Tylenol and popped a few in my mouth. I swallowed it without water, making my throat fell even more dry. I looked at the mess of feathers I had made and went out the door, not bothering to get out of the clothes I was still wearing from the other day. When I saw Sora munching on his waffle as he read the newspaper, I noticed a feather sticking out the back of his head. I walked by and grabbed it out and stuck it in my own hair and plopped down on the chair opposite of him.

"Sorry." I said quietly, attempting to redeem myself. He continued munching. I ran a hand through my hair, upset, and then just stared at the plate that had pancakes on it. I heard him swallow and then look up at me.

"It's okay. I'm sure it's not your fault your brain is so slow in the morning." He said with a slight smirk and took a gulp of milk, turning a page of the paper. I gaped at him as the voice in my head started to go into a frenzy. I did my best to just try to ignore it as I stabbed the stack of pancakes soaked in syrup. Bringing it to my plate I glanced at the glass of milk next to me. It was strawberry milk. That's the only milk I'll drink. I placed the pancakes on my plate and then looked at him expectantly. He just continued to read the paper. Sighing, I stabbed my pancakes again and pulled out a piece of it and started to chew slowly on it.

Every time I swallowed he would look at me. I didn't know why but he did. So I would take a longer time to chew my food just to see if it was because of me swallowing and not because he had some weird problem with looking up at people at regular intervals. He did look at me when I swallowed.

"What?" I finally asked and he grinned.

"You make a weird noise when you swallow." I stared at him blankly.

"What?"

"When you swallow you make this weird gulping sound." I hadn't the slightest idea what he was talking about so he sighed. "Like this." Then he made the strangest noise in the world that sounded like...a cow swallowing molasses. I really have no idea what that sounds like, but that's what it made me think of. He then laughed at me; I couldn't imagine what my face looked like.

"I do not!" I protested, taking a huge bite out of my pancake and swallowing. Oh my God, I do make a strange sound! I stared at him astonished and he only laughed harder. Scowling I jugged my strawberry milk and stomped into the living room. _Temper, temper._ "Shut up." I growled and sat down on the couch staring at the TV screen.

"You know, TV is more exciting when it's on." I heard him come up from behind me and I turned too look at him. He had his arms crossed on the top of the couch with his head lying on it with a sideways grin plastered on his face. Damn, he was good looking. I turned away from him to continue sulking but he just laughed and sat right next to me. **Right **next to me. It then dawned on me that I was on the right of the couch and he was on the left. Shit. I continued to look forward as he turned on the TV and started to flip through the channels. The screen flashed with the letters "DVD" and then an anime came on that I knew. If I remembered correctly, it was called Spiral. A guy with brown hair was watching a TV screen of his own intently as a commercial played about buying a knife set. A girl burst through the door, ranting but he paid no attention to her, telling he to be quiet because he needed the number. This reminded me of a time I wanted to a buy a knife set like that. It was only $19.99 and it came with like fifty knifes. But this one had a anti-bacterial cutting board. This one sounded better. But the other one came with a carving knife, I wonder if the one in the show came with a carving knife. Or that electronic cutter that moved back and forth by itself. That certainly would mean less work for me-

"Eyes is hot." I snapped out of it and turned my head to stare at Sora. He looked at me and shrugged. "He is." I looked on the screen to see a guy with hair like mine sitting and playing the piano. Some red head was in the background talking and this 'Eyes' character kept playing the piano. Weird, I used to play the piano everyday...

"I think he looks like you." My eyes went wide and I felt a blush creeping up on my cheeks. "His hair is the same..." He grabbed a longer lock of my hair from the back and started to twirl it around his fingers. Every curse was flying through my mind as I felt his body getting closer to mine. "I bet he would smell like you too.." My face was hot and I shot straight up and started to hyperventilate.

"I have to sue the bathroom." And I sprint to the bathroom and locked it.

_Good job. _"Shut up!" I almost yelled at the voice as it snickered back at me and I frantically realized that I wasn't feeling like I should. And I couldn't get out to get what I needed. Panicking, I started to quickly look around the bathroom as the voice started to get louder and louder. _Can't even let someone get that close to you? I thought you didn't have that type of problem. Are you afwaid sweetie? _It snickered and I cursed loudly. _Hmm it seems like you're even stupider than I thought to forget to get it from your bag. I guess I'll be staying around for a while longer. Last time I came back faster than normal didn't I? Oh I bet Sora hates you now. He seemed pretty into you and you went and 'had to use the bathroom.' What kind of excuse was that? Don't you want him? Or is Stupid your real name? So you've been lying all this time! I wonder what Sora will say when he finds out your real name. I bet he already knows. I bet that he-_

"I don't care! Shut up!" I yelled and I opened the cabinet looking for anything.

"Riku?" I heard Sora's voice drift through the doorway. _Good job. I guess he'll call the psycho place for you now. Not like that could help. I just love you so much I can't leave you! You know what, this has to stop. I don't want to be separated from you because your too much a moronic goofy nitwit to be without me. So I think-_

You don't think." I hissed as I found a razor in the cabinet. "See you later." I grinned wildly as I pulled the sleeve of my sweater up.

* * *

Ah ha! Did anyone see where I stopped worrying? It was right after Riku was listennig to the MCR song that I was like this is crap! So because I couldn't rewrite the beginning of it, I just decided to keep writing it the way I wanted to. (Omg and the DDR, I'm sorry, but I'm addicted to that game xD)

So...What do we think? Do we know Riku's lovely problems yet? I'll give you a hint, there are three in all...well four including the voice. I love my little depressing Riku. Ya know, that voice isn't really that bad, in fact it's pretty true. I'm not going to say how it is, but let's just say I know some stuff about hearing voices like that. But I guess the voices aren't the same for everyone neh?

Don't worry, everyone else will be blended into the story in the next chapter. Kairi is going to be calling a lot... Cid might show up as a traveling flamethrower salesman... (actually...that sounds intresting...)

This story is like.. the counterpart to my other one. That one was Sora's happy POV and this is angsty Riku's POV. Riku is fun to write, but I think I like Sora better... hmm... So anyways... go review please! **:D**


	3. Chapter 3

So sorry! It took me forever to update didn't it? Oh, I was working on projects, and I should be doing homework right now but pssh, forget that! I got loyal fanfiction readers to serve! And yes, I do know that Riku said I have to sue the bathroom in the last chapter,; I'm sure you all know it was use and not sue. But I will fix that...eventually...

Disclaimer: I don't own it. If I did, I would be greatly influenced by my friend to make Sora jump Riku during the game and have him molest him. Because she wants him seme, but I like Riku seme. But we'll just have to wait till KH2 to get more info on who would really be seme ;D

Warning: Angsty Riku...uhhh...(insert regular ranting of how I don't think my writing is good enough here) well my beta read this so I hope she got all the mistakes and stuff. Don't look at me Bob! You weren't online in time to read it first! Okay, now that that hidden message is out of the way, hehe, on with the angsty filled chapter of doom!

* * *

A funny thing happened. After I got out of the bathroom, Sora was talking to someone on the phone. He saw me instantly as I walked into the kitchen and he shoved the phone at me, saying it was Kairi. He ran to the bathroom; I guess he really had to go.

"Riku?" I heard Kairi's accented voice on the other side. Even if she knew Japanese, it was still heavily influenced by her American accent. I made a slight 'mmhmm' to tell her I was there as I kicked open Sora's fridge to get something to drink. I can't let go of the phone and cradle it against my shoulder, it's one of those talents I couldn't get.

"Oh Riku! I have the best news!" She paused as if I was going to reply a giddy 'what?' like her friend Selphie would, but I just continued to look in the fridge. "Well, all us girls here, have come to the conclusion that..." I heard a series of giggles from the other side of the phone. "Sora will propose to me!" I almost dropped the carton of milk I had managed to get out of the fridge. I was able to get it on the counter with a heave as I fumbled with it and managed to gasp a 'what!'

"Well, we've been going out since like... junior year right? So now it's been like..." a giggle "five years! I mean, He has to propose sometime soon. So we think-" another giggle. "It will be this time I see him!" My eye twitched from the giggling and I grabbed a glass from the cupboard as I stayed silent on the phone. Kairi cleared her throat on the other side and I sighed to let her know I was still there.

"Well," she said, her voice a bit uneasy. "The next plane we were able to get you is in about a week so you'll have to stay there." I groaned, there was no way I was going to be able to stay here with him, especially now that Kairi has told me that she was sure he would be getting her a shiny diamond ring. I felt a headache come on, and started down the hallway to get my pills from my bag. As I was able to enter the room Sora came back out of the bathroom.

"Hey Riku, mind letting me talk to her?" He asked and I just nodded.

"Wait Riku!" Her voice crackled over the phone.

"What?" I sighed.

"Promise you won't tell?" She pleaded, as if I would waste my time telling him she knew. No, I would waste my time trying to find out if that was the truth.

"I promise. Cross my heart and hope to die." I said, crossing my finger over my heart and then handed Sora the phone. I shuffled into my room, grabbed the bottle of pills, and downed a few. The funny part of all this is, that I was serious when I said 'hope to die.'

* * *

I was sitting in the living room with the bottle of headache pills, finding that this was a useful way to keep the voice at bay for a little when it would seem suspicious if I went to the bathroom more than once in an hour. I had decided to change my clothes and wear my other outfit of black pants, shirt, and over sized hoodie. Glaring at the screen, I was trying to shoot laser beams at it or something, after I was putting my clothes into the dresser and found something in it. 

Since I was staying here for a while, I decided to put my clothes in the dresser so that they wouldn't get all wrinkly in my suitcase. When I found an empty draw, it appeared to be that all the way in the back was a little box. And in that little box was this small diamond ring.

You can probably tell why I am now wishing I was the guy Eyes in the DVD that was still on. There are plenty of hot guys in that show. I'm sure one of them has to be gay. I mean, if you lived in a world where all the guys were that nice looking, I would expect all the guys to be gay.

"Riku!" Sora bounced over the couch and landed next to me on the couch. He saw the almost half empty bottle in my hand and raised an eyebrow. "Some bad headache, eh?" He asked and I just nodded wearily. All these pills were making me drowsy.

"Well, have I got a surprise for you!" He said with a cheery smile that could kill any emo kid. I raised an eyebrow at him as I continued to watch the TV. I really didn't have any idea what they were doing, but it was something to distract me from him. "We are going to go to the mall!" He clapped excitedly. Okay, I guess he doesn't get out much.

"I'd rather not." I replied. I slumped farther down in the couch. I think I'll just go back to sleep, that's something that isn't torturing for me. I can dream all I want about Sora not going to get married to Kairi. Sora puffed his cheeks out and pouted, glaring at me.

"You're no fun!" He snapped at me, as he got off the couch and stomped to the kitchen. "And the milk is going to spoil now!" He yelled as I remembered I never put it back in the fridge. Oops.

"Oh the horrors." I said sarcastically as I closed my eyes and leaned against the arm of the couch. I slowly drifted off as I heard Sora ranting in the kitchen.

* * *

Ding Dong. My eyes shot open and I quickly sat up. Realizing that I had gone to sleep I looked around to see if Sora was there. 

"Sora?" I called out, but he didn't answer. I shrugged my shoulders and shuffled to the front door. Someone had to answer it.

"Hello!" A tall guy with blonde hair and a cigarette in his mouth smiled. I blinked at him.

"Sora isn't here if you're here to see him." I said and I started to close the front door.

"No, sir! I'm not here to see him!" I stopped my hand and reopened the door. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm here..." He said as he pointed to a large black suitcase. "To sell this marvelous flamethrower to you!"

"What?" I asked, not understanding.

"This flamethrower could be yours sonny boy!" I stared at the man and saw a name tag on him.

"I'm sorry Cid, but I'm not interested in a flamethrower." I answered him. His face screwed up and he crossed his arms.

"Look here bud, I didn't come the way here to get told off, now are ya going to buy the flamethrower or what?" I shook my head no.

"What about some tea?"

"I like tea."

"Well, this flamethrower can also be a tea maker!" He grinned and I grabbed the door handle. This guy was kind of scary.

"Well, I'm sorry but I don't have any money right now to buy the tea maker... flamethrower." I answered.

"Oh, so now you don't want it? You're too good for the tea maker? Huh? Is that it?" He said and I shook my head.

"No, I didn't say that!"

"Oh Cid!" I heard Sora and looked around the blonde to see him running up the driveway with a bag of groceries. Cid looked at Sora like he didn't know who he was.

"Cid? Remember? I bought that from you last week!" He said and pushed past him and me into the house.

"You did?" He said, confused.

"Oh yeah, It's a lovely tea maker, I love it." Sora grinned.

"Really? See, I didn't know if I should just leave it as a flamethrower or-"

"No no, it's great! Okay, I gotta go put my stuff away. See you next week!" Sora continued to smile as he closed the door. He turned to me.

"Never open the door for him. If you try to refuse his offer he will **make** you buy the tea maker." He padded into the kitchen and threw the bag down on the table. "Just pretend like you already have it and he'll go away." He said as he took out a few cartons of milk and opened the fridge to put them in.

"Doesn't he realize you're lying?" I asked and Sora shook his head.

"Cid used to be the owner of a tea shop down the street. But one day he took a slip down some icy stairs and got brain damage." He said as he threw the paper bag into the trash. "He doesn't even remember falling, or that he ever owned a tea shop. He lives alone in a beaten down house now, because he never remembered to pay his bills for the nice house he used to live in. His wife left him."

"So everyone lies to him?" I asked.

"We have to. Telling him the truth wouldn't help. He wouldn't remember it. Leon, Cloud and I all worked for him. Once we tried to tell him about the tea shop, and he couldn't take the fact that he had lost everything." Sora smiled sadly at me. "Sometimes it's better to lie so you don't hurt the ones you care for." He walked out of the kitchen.

I know what the consequences of that are. I never told my adoptive family that I was gay because of that.

* * *

(obvious change of days since he will now be eating breakfast...)

* * *

_Don't wanna eat the breakfast do you? Just put it to waste._ I held my head in my hands as I leaned against the counter. I'm not hungry I told the voice, but it continued to rant in my head. 

"Another headache?" Sora asked as he walked into the room with a mess of bed hair. I tried to hide my blush as I noticed that he wasn't wearing a shirt and just swim trunks. Wait, swim trunks?

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously. He grinned widely at me as he grabbed a box of Captain Crunch from the counter.

"**We **are going to go to the beach today."

"The beach?" I choked out.

"Yes, we need to get some color on you. You look paler than George Washington's white horse." He laughed at his joke but I didn't. I didn't want to go to the beach because the beach means the heat. The heat means not being able to wear long sleeves or risk passing out. This leads to me not being able to wear a shirt long enough to hide it.

"Umm..." I started, trying to think of a way to get out of it.

"Oh, we have to go shopping first to get you a bathing suit don't we?" Yes! Savior! I can buy the bathing suit, and buy those lovely wrist cuffs!

"Great!" I said a bit too quickly and he looked at me confused.

"Uh, okay. We'll go after breakfast."

* * *

Shopping was good because I got my black arm warmers and they were very nice leather. I also was able to get out of having to wear this pair of hideous swim trunks that Sora insisted on. He said that I would like good in rubber duckies. I was able to convince him otherwise and got, surprise surprise, black instead. 

As we sat on the bus to get to the beach, I stared out the window, instead of at his bare chest because he decided he didn't want to wear a shirt. I on the other hand, was wearing a shirt that had a heart that was mutilated by the club with spikes that was still impaled in it. Sora had taken a disliking to my shirt that I was perfectly fine with. When I had walked out of the room he immediately demanded to know why I was wearing a shirt followed by why do you have such depressing shirts. I told him that life was depressing and I was counting the seconds till I died. He hadn't talked to me since.

I turned my eyes slightly when I heard Sora sigh loudly as he pulled his legs up onto the chair and sat cross legged. I wanted to ask him what was his problem, but I already knew it so what would asking do? It's not like being nice to him would change anything. _Because he's with Kairi._ I groaned as the voice made its presence known and slumped down on the bench.

_Nothing you could do could stop Sora. You're just someone he has to take care of until he can get rid of you. He really doesn't like you; he's only putting up with you for Kairi. There's no way-_

"We're here!" Sora exclaimed excitedly, grabbed his bag of whatever, and literally leaped down the aisle and off the bus. I on the other hand, took my time walking and almost got stuck on the bus. When I finally got off, Sora was already prancing around on the sand. I stepped off the road and waited till the bus left, just watching him. He stopped mid jump and caught my eye. I started walking and staring at the finely grained lovely sand. You know, sand is just so interesting. I love counting how many grains get stuck between my toes and make me go crazy.

"Rikuuu..." A husky voice breathed onto my neck, making me tense up and stop counting the grains of sand. I felt a finger start to twirl a long strand of hair and the owner of hand still didn't appear.

"Stop hiding behind me Sora," I groaned and grabbed the hand in my hair to make it stop.

"What are you talking about? I'm right here." I jerked my head to the left and cursed to myself. Sora raised an eyebrow at me and stared at me. He was trying to figure it out, but I wasn't about to let him.

"Well, why don't we go find somewhere to sit." I said as I started to look around and wander about as if I knew where I was going. There was hardly anyone on the beach, most likely because I was told by Kairi during briefing that the American kids still had school. So it was easy enough to stand in one spot and claim it as your own because no one really cared.

"Great," I heard Sora walking towards me. "Now only one thing missing..." he trailed off and before I had time to turn to give him a quizzical look, two hands grabbed the bottom of my shirt and pulled it forcefully over my head.

"Hey!" I turned quickly in an attempt to grab my shirt back but Sora held it away from me with a smirk on his face.

"No shirts allowed on the beach." He said as if there was a giant sign post saying that. I turned a slight pink and turned back around. I wasn't about to fight for my shirt since that seems very stupid and there was no one here. So I was okay...except for the fact that I could feel Sora's eyes burning through my back. I cleared my throat loudly and sat down on the sand, spreading my toes out and pulling the sand out from between them. Gross, but sand is disgusting. I hate how it gets stuck and then when it gets wet it's almost impossible to get off.

"Riku, don't be so boring!" Something soft hit me on the back of my head and I turned to see a beach ball rolling a bit away from me. I looked at the grinning brunette and then continued to sit on the sand. He instantly gained a pouting face and stomped over to me.

"Come on!" He then pulled my hair. He **pulled **my hair. Oh I don't think so; no one pulls my hair and gets away with it. I shot up and grabbed his arm and looked downwards at him. I got a nervous grin in return and I smirked. I pulled on his arm so that his head crashed against my chest and I bear hugged him with one arm and then started to rub my knuckles furiously into his skull. HAH! Fear the 'noogie'! FEAR IT.

"Hey!" Sora whined and moved his head and bit my arm. I released him with a shout and he started to run down the beach laughing manically. I snorted and chased him down, pushing him into the surf. I pinned his two arms down to either side of him as I straddled him and grinned at him victoriously.

"Don't drown me!" He giggled out and tried to pull his arms up but I just pushed them back down. He pouted and stuck his tongue out at me. "Fine, you win."

"Because I always-Omfph!" Sora rolled me over so now he was on top and my hair was getting soaked with that disgusting salt water. My poor hair, it's going to look so bad tomorrow.

"Because I always win!" Sora laughed and then jumped up and started to prance back to where the beach ball was. I sat up and shook out my hair and frowned at soaking leather bands on my arms. Just great, I sighed. I looked out to the ocean as the waves started to come in faster and bigger, crashing into the sand as the water went up to my ankles. My mind was blank for once, and the voice was surprisingly not talking to me.

Starting to wonder if I was dreaming or not, someone cleared their throat to the left of me. I turned my head sharply, making it crack as I saw Sora staring at me. I sighed in relief that it was only him and went back to looking out at the ocean, but Sora didn't sit down to join me. I buried my feet into the sand nervously even if I hated it and turned my head to see him staring at me from where he stood with the beach ball. I couldn't tell what expression was on his face but it was making me start to feel like I would be needing my bag pretty soon.

But Sora sighed and sat down on my left making my feet go deeper into the sand.

"Will you tell me why you count the seconds?" He said in a voice that had an undertone of sadness.

"What?" I asked, not knowing what seconds he was talking about.

"You said, you were counting the seconds until you died." I curled my toes in the sand and clenched my jaw. "Will you tell me why?"

"No." I said immediately, not giving my mind any time to debate over it. Sora sighed heavily and there was a moment of silence between us. The sun was starting to set, and no matter what I read in the books, I was watching it. Not like it would matter much if I stared at it knowing the rumors that if you stare at the sun like that you'll go blind.

"Is a part of it because you're blind in your left eye," he said, more like a statement of fact than a question. I clenched my jaw tightly, feeling my head start to hurt as I refused to answer him.

"Will you tell me why you are blind in one eye?" He asked. I felt my heart start to tug as a part of my brain told me it was okay while the other told me not to. And I was tired of listening to the one that told me no.

"My father beat me." I said as blandly as I could, trying to make believe it didn't bother me. I was hoping that he would end his mission to pry into Riku's private life, but it didn't.

"Why?"

"I told him I was gay." I brought my knees up to my chest and rested my chin on them as I glared at the horizon. Sora was silent making the regret start to form in my head that now Sora wouldn't even talk to me. I closed my eyes and held back the droplets of tears that were forming behind the lids. Crying won't solve anything, it only makes it worse. I opened my eyes and my arms were throbbing but there was no where I could go. I heard Sora shift on the sand with the crackling sand, but I couldn't see what he was doing. Cursing myself and everything I could think of, I was about ready to go stomp off to sulk and be alone when I felt Sora grab my throbbing arm. He pulled it towards him and I looked at nothing, pretending that I didn't notice.

But I did notice the fact that he was going to learn a second secret of mine. I knew it and nothing in my body told me to stop him though. I continued to sit and do nothing as he pulled the leather over my fingers and eventually my arm was bare. I felt his soft delicate fingers run over the cuts and scars that started at my wrist and ended below my elbow, tracing over every single one. His fingers glided across my skin back down to my wrist and then they went across my palm as he lined up his fingers with mine I turned my head to look at him sitting facing me and staring at my hand.

"It's okay." He said quietly as he held my hand and looked at me with a bittersweet look.

I buried my face into his chest and cried.

* * *

Awww... depressed like Riku has two of his secrets leaked! And what about Kairi and Selphie's assumptions? Is that ring really for the red head demon of evil giggles or is there a different reason Sora has it? 

And poor Riku, if you didn't figure it out from this chapter, I'll just refresh your mind and let you know that Riku obviously doesn't live with his parents. Well, his birth parents. I got that idea from remembering a show (randomly I might add) about how some kids were kicked out of their homes after they told their parents that they weren't straight. I think that's very sad, I mean, how can you disown/beat/ignore etc your kid like that? It makes me very sad. :(

There are some secretive hints in this chapter! Actually, I only know of one hehe, so if you can figure out the rest of the plot from here, good for you! If not... good for you! **:D **(Oh and I absolutely love Cid, and I tried hard to keep him as close as in character as possible. I never really played FF7 and didn't pay much attention to him in KH eheh. But I do know he likes tea.)

There once was a girl who finished uploading her chapter. This girl then sat at her computer and awaited eagerly for any reviews that might come.

In other words, I would become very happy, so go review **review** _review_ and then read some other Sora/Riku goodness:)


	4. Chapter 4

Yeah well, you see, Kingdom Hearts II has come out so um, my life revolves around it... right now... eheheh...

Disclaimer: not mine.

Warnings: Shorter than normal because I am currently going throught Kingdom Hearts II for any chance of seeing Riku. I have... a few times hehe.

* * *

I don't remember falling asleep.

But here I was half way away because I heard someone go "Wake up sleepy head."

And when I opened my eyes all the way it was Sora grinning at me. He covered my mouth as I was about to pen it in a yelp of surprise and he giggled.

"Have a good sleep? I did. What do you want for breakfast today?" I blinked at him, not quite sure why he was lying in my bed. Well it was his bed, but it was mine right now. He pouted as he moved a lock of my silver hair out of my eyes and behind my ear. "Sheesh, it's not that difficult." Overload, seriously.

"What are you doing?" I sat up in the bed to find that we both indeed did have our clothes. I wasn't sure if that was a positive or negative thing since it seemed like Sora had slept with me last night.

"What do you mean?" He rolled over onto is back and leaned forward to rest his head in his hands. His eyes locked onto mine as he smiled at me and I raised an eyebrow at him.

"I mean, why are you-" Ring! I glared at the phone that Sora had happily skipped over to and answered.

"Hey Kairi!" My heart sunk. Oh yeah, the red head. Sora started to stroll around the house while he chatted on the phone with her. I sighed as I got out of the bed and went to the kitchen. I poured myself a bowl of some cereal that had a leprechaun on it and started to drown it in milk. I hate it when it's not soaked in milk. I watched as he walked back in forth across the kitchen and to various other parts of the house.

"Oh no, we're leaving next week like I said..." He walked out again. I saw the newspaper on the table and grabbed it, hoping to be able to read it.

"...okay I'll bring Mr. Sunshine's hairbrush. I can't believe he won't use a different..." He walked through the kitchen again. I stared at the newspaper trying to figure out the words on the headline. It was bad enough that it was written in English. I turned the page to see a bunch of comic strips. So that word must be comics...

"...well I'm sure Cloud would be glad to share. It's not like they haven't shared a bed before, if you get what I'm saying..." I rose my eyebrow at him as he walked back across the room. Can't he not talk about private things and wander the house? I continued to stare at the comic, trying to figure out what this one was talking about. There was a duck in a suit and it was talking to this waiter. Hmm... April... the month... I know that and that word says... Fool's...

"I see." I almost jumped out of the chair as Sora breathed onto my neck.

"W-what?" I managed to say as I tried to move my chair in a non-conspicuous way away from him. But he stayed right next to me.

"Nothing." He smiled and then pointed at the paper. "It's April Fool's Day." I stared at him.

"What?"

"That says April Fool's Day." He pointed to it. I narrowed my eyes, annoyed that he was helping me read. And then it clicked in my head, maybe he's being nice because it's April Fool's Day...

"But it's no fun for me," He grabbed the leprechaun's cereal and poured himself two bowls of it. He eats a lot. "So I do it opposite." I blinked at him. How do you do the opposite of doing a prank on someone?

"I know, I just am truthful on that day instead. I've done it since I was like what, five. I just didn't want to be mean to anyone. Besides, it's more fun to see people's reactions." Sora shoved his cereal in his mouth. "Kairi wasn't too thrilled though..." He frowned and continued eating.

"What about her?" I asked as I started to collect the milk in my spoon to drink it. I didn't like to slurp things. Sora chugged the milk left in his bowl and wiped his mouth with his bare arm. Bare...I took a double take to realize he wasn't wearing a shirt. My face got hot as I got up from the table to empty the bowl and to avoid Sora's look.

"I told her the truth today." I stopped washing the bowl. "I told her that I was bi today." I almost choked on the air. "Surprising no? I thought she would take it nicely but she had a fit. I don't think she'll be calling tomorrow..." He had a thoughtful look and then swallowed down the rest of his cereal and walked into the living room, leaving his bowl there. I cautiously followed him to see him watching that show Spiral again.

Sitting down, I saw the character that looked like me talking to a girl with gray hair in a hospital bed. As soon as I sat down, Sora glided over to sit next to me. I kept my eyes on the screen but felt something lean on my arm. I looked down to see Sora's head. Continuing to watch the show became increasingly harder as his sapphire eyes started to bore into the side of my head. I finally looked at him with a questioning look but he just smiled and then turned to watch the show. I shook my head and put it in the palm of my hand as I started to watch the show.

* * *

I woke up not knowing that I had actually gone to sleep. I sat up and looked around, Sora no where in sight. Either A) he left or B) the sound of the running water in the bathroom meant he was taking a shower. It turned off as soon as I had decided he was in there and I felt myself get a bit giddy at the prospect that he might come out in only a wet towel.

Dirty mind! Go away!

But my deepest desire happened to be true as he trod out of the steaming bathroom with one hand doing a poor job at trying to hold up one side of the towel as the other side clung to his hips. He must have caught me drooling (which I will admit would have been hard for me not to) because he sauntered, that's right, he swayed those hips in the most... seductive way possible and then giggled. The giggling kind of killed it.

"Are you going to take a shower now?" He said and I could barely nod my head as he stood there dripping wet and pulled on his towel. "Okay, then." He grinned and then went away. Oh, I must have died. I must have finally died from cutting myself sometime during the day. My...

I cursed at my sad inability to have said something to him but I just grabbed my stuff and got in the shower.

* * *

I was inspecting the cuts that were on my arm when I realized the voice hadn't been here since the afternoon yesterday. Pondering where it could have gone, but definitely not missing it, I ran my fingers over the scars on my arm. Sora had done that yesterday. I felt my heart beat a bit faster as I thought about the spiky haired brunette that just happened to walk in. Thankfully, or not, I had already gotten my pants on. He started to walk, it seemed, aimlessly around the bathroom until he ended up next to me. I looked over at him and he was humming a little tune as he lifted his hand and put it over mine. Sending him a puzzled look that he didn't see, he laced his fingers in mine.

"Want some pizza?" He smiled at me and I slightly nodded my head. He started to drag me out of the bathroom and to the phone, never letting go of my hand. "I've got a game. We can only use the hand that isn't being held." He grinned. Not knowing what caused him to think of such a game, I just nodded my head, thinking of any possible consequences. Thinking of nothing bad. He picked up the phone and handed it to me. I took it and he dialed the number for pizza.

After some difficultly of talking to the man who's English was limited to "yo" and "man," Sora led me over to the couch. I noticed that he had grabbed my right hand with his left, seemingly purposely so that I could always see him. The remote was closest to him, but he didn't pick it up. We just sat there in silence until the doorbell rang. He got up and I had to follow because of his silly game. The delivery man gave us a funny look but before Sora skillfully took the pie with one hand and closed the door, he stuck his tongue out at the guy. He set the pie down on the table and was able to open the box.

'So," I said looking at our plates. "We will eat the pizza how?" Sora looked at the untouched pie and frowned. He too had realized that his game would not allow a person to take a slice of pizza without practically destroying the pie.

"We work together!" He grabbed one side of the pizza slice and motioned for me to grab the other slice next to it. He pulled his off while I held mine, but in the process took the other pizza slice with him and it fell on the table. "Hmm..." He quickly put the slice of pizza down and grabbed the other one. "Three second rule." Gross.

I was able to get my pizza off a bit easier with his help and started to try to eat it with one hand. I am not very good at not being messy, and using only one hand did not help. I was not a good pizza eater I have to admit. I got a question in my head since the beginning of the day and finally decided to ask him.

"If someone asks you a question today, you tell the truth too?" I asked as he swallowed a piece of his pizza whole. He was like my old dog, gave him a piece that was huge, he swallowed it, but give him a tiny piece he would chew it for about five minutes.

"Mmm.. Yeah." He swallowed another piece of the pizza and looked at me. 'Why?" Crap, don't lose your courage now.

"Is there...is there someone else you like?" I asked. He stopped chewing the tiny piece of pizza from the slice that fell on the table. "I was just wondering. You said you told Kairi you were bi so I thought maybe there was a reason to it because it was kind of random that would tell her that. Uhh..." Crap, sure now look like an idiot. I could almost feel the voice creeping its way slowly back into my head. Sora stared at me thoughtfully and then smiled.

"You got some sauce on your mouth." I wiped my hand over my mouth and looked at it. What was he talking about? I looked back up at him confused but then he decided to answer my question. He got out of his chair and stood next to me with his big grin on his face.

"You missed it." He said in a playful tone and that's when he leaned forward and placed his lips on mine.

* * *

Omg that was weird. Well anyways...

OMG there should be like a Axel and Roxas BFFs club or something. Omg sooo cute!

Eheheh... some reviews might tear me away from the game long enough to whip up another chapter for you. ;D


	5. Chapter 5

I am truly sorry. But my inspiration is dead. I've been screaming at my muse to come back to life, but I lost all my pheonix downs. So it stays on my bedroom floor, dead. So this chapter is a chapter that by the end was forced out. Although it is going in the direction I want it to go, it is crap. So my muse just has to come back. Until then, I got to start writing something else I guess. Listening to Fall Out Boy is actually helpful... it was until it deicded to give me another story idea. So maybe if I start writing that story, FOB will come back to save me and revive my muse with its magical powers so that I can write some more.

Disclaimer: No own.

* * *

And then we had a heated make out session.

Hah, in my dreams.

Instead it ended up that I was so stunned I just sat there with my eyes wide open like a deer in the headlights. Every single thought in my mind was either "Oh my God" or "Kiss him you fool!" But they weren't acted out leaving me to stare blankly when Sora pulled away. Sora seemed slightly nervous, probably because my reaction was nothing and tugged slightly at the edge of his shirt. He let go of my hand.

_Great job._ Shit. If it was possible, my eyes would have gotten even widen at the sound of the long missing voice that had just slithered its way back into my mind. And I did not want it there. Trying to think quickly to fix the situation, I tried to form a full sentence in my mind before I started to sputter out nonsense. But the voice in my head kept on ranting and it wasn't making anything easier.

When the phone rang Sora leapt at it like a rabid monkey and picked it up. I bet he was looking for any excuse to end the awkward silence between us. And him trying to avoid it did not help me in my quest to stop the voice in my head.

"Oh hey Kairi!" I got up from the table at the sound of his cheerful voice and headed as quickly, but as not conspicuously, as I could. But it seemed that Sora had noticed me suddenly movement towards the bathroom as I heard him say something unidentifiably into the phone and it slammed onto the hook. I started running and I couldn't even hear my own footsteps the voice was so loud now. All of it was nothing but a jumbled mess of hatred and pity for my pathetic self and I wanted it to end. But I wasn't fast enough as I turned to slam the door shut, Sora caught it.

Narrowing my eyes and a growl emitted from my throat as I pushed on the door but he stuck his foot in on the bottom and kept his hand right on the edge to keep me from shutting it. I latched my hand onto his and started to dig my nails, which I hadn't cut for 2 weeks (they grow fast), into his hand. He bit his lip and I saw the blood start to trickle out from under his teeth. He opened his mouth and shouted something at me but I was too busy trying to close the door and listening to the loud voice to hear. My head throbbing, I growled again and then bit his arm, something I did not expect myself to do. He didn't seem to have expected it either, for he yelped and pulled his arm back as I staggered backwards in my own surprise.

"Go away!" I hissed as I regained my compose and was going to close the door when Sora's face was right up in mine. My eyes widened and Sora suddenly pulled me into a tight embrace.

Everything went silent.

I stood there as the brunette held me so close I could feel his heart beat through my chest. Slowly, almost unconsciously, I rose my arms and wrapped them around his smaller frame, burying my face in his spiky chocolate hair. We stood there for quite some time before Sora broke the silence.

"I want to play a game." He said, his breath tingling my neck. I shivered at the hot air, but kept head on top of his, his face in the crook of my neck.

"it's called Truth or Dare." I pulled slightly away from him with a puzzled look. He just grinned at me, like he knew something I didn't. Which I'm sure he did. "I'm sure you know the game. Want to play?" I stayed silent, and chose to instead rest my head on his shoulder. I felt his smile and pulled him closer to me. "I'll go first then. Truth or Dare?" I don't think either one would make much of a difference so I sighed heavily and muttered "Truth."

"Okay. Do you like me?" I hesitated. What should I say? I'm supposed to tell the truth, but who ever does when they play this game? He did kiss me before, but I didn't react. So if I say yes will it even make a difference after I 'rejected' him like that? I brought a hand up to let it run through his spiky hair and I frowned. It doesn't matter anymore what I say.

"Yeah." I said almost inaudibly. I got no response other than a nod. It's my turn.

"Truth or Dare?" I asked.

"Truth." I thought about it. What should I ask him? I hadn't thought about it. I thought about how the day went, and if there was anything that would help me make up a question, when a certain red head crossed my mind.

"Do you like Kairi?" I asked, afraid of what the answer would be.

"Only as a friend." I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Truth." I said before he was able to ask. I wasn't ready to take on a dare. I never was.

"Do you think you like me more than like? More than a friend?" I halted in my stroking of his hair, confused. Didn't he ask that question? Was he trying to make sure?

"Yes." I answered, but got response for it. "Dare." I had to think about that one again.

"I dare you... I dare you to stop eating like a pig." I chuckled as he grinned.

"I'll try," he answered and I smirked. I wonder how long he could go like that. Feeling up to it, Sora had already done it so I could to, I told him Dare. He was silent, making me nervous as I shifted my weight to my other foot and back.

"I dare you to kiss me." I hesitated. I wasn't sure if I could do that, was that dare even allowed in the game?

"What?" Sora pulled away from me and looked into my eyes with his bright blue ones.

"Kiss me." I couldn't believe what he was saying. But he continued to stare at me, waiting for me to complete the Dare so we could go on with the game. So slowly, ever so slowly, my hand left its place on top of his head as it fell to his shoulder, and I leaned forward. Just when our breaths started to melt together I stopped and looked at his eyes again, which we as calm as ever. So I slowly brought my lips down on his.

* * *

Snoring. Lots of snoring. I covered my eyes with my hands to shield them from the bright and shinning sun that wanted to happily wake me up this fine morning with its death rays of brightness, as I turned over to find the source of the obscene noise. And I found the source of the noise.

It was Sora. Missing his shirt. And after realizing I didn't have a shirt either and other articles of clothing, I could only imagine that Sora was also missing some other clothes. And after a moment of finally actually waking up, I remembered.

Holy crap.

* * *

Aha, I don't need you to tell me it was crap, I know it was. Okay, well you can review (it would definately make me so much happier.) I am telling you, this is the work of my friend killing my four leaf clover. Ever since then my mind has been a total blank for creativity on this story. :sigh:

Well I can't blame it on everything else besides myself so... I shall attempt to try to make contact with the plot squirrels and see if they will come over from Planet Acorn to help revive my muse, Mr. Panda, with their mystical squirrel magic. I am very good friends with them, I'm sure they will help. So keep your fingers crossed :D


	6. Chapter 6

Aha! The plot squirrels landed as soon as I called them! They revived Mr. Panda, (my moose muse) and Mr. Panda thought f a great ending! No this isn't the last chapter, har har har. Yeah I know what you're thinking. (shifty eyes)

anyways, I have been fighting my inner fangirl this whole time so that the story will come out the way I want it. This is after all, angst, and the inner fangirl isn't supposed to win at angst. It should be angsty, not a lot of making out and drooling. (the drooling is on my part... heh)

My bete read it too, so it should be grammer and spelling good (stares at beta.) Anyway, did anyone else notice that in both my stories there are planes? That's interesting... I don't get what's with my obsession and putting planes into the story but they like planes. Planes are soo cool, but I hate when your ears pop when you go up and down and- yeah okay time for the story xD

Disclaimer: hmm... maybe... no wait. No, I don't own them. (Peanuts on the planes taste good too.)

* * *

I sat straight up and ran a hand through my hair. Okay Riku, think. This should not have happened. I took a deep breath in as Sora rolled to the other side to block the sun's rays and continued to sleep. Running my hand through my hair again with a sigh I decided it would be best if I took a shower first to clear my thoughts.

After I got out of the shower, I was sure to have every piece of clothing on along with my sweater that said "Victims, aren't we all?" I went into the bedroom and after finding that Sora wasn't in there, I closed the door behind me. He was most likely at the moment scoffing down some food so I would have some time to think. Think about how last night should not have been, and the oblivious person on the other side of the globe.

Kairi. She had done nothing to deserve this. Yes, I admit, she would constantly get on my nerves, and I wanted to kill her sometimes, but no one deserves something like this. She had sent me over here on a mission to get her boyfriend safely to Japan because she trusted me. She trusted me, and I was glad to have earned the trust from someone at last. And now I just shattered it. She did not deserve for her boyfriend to have slept with her best friend.

Because that's what Sora was. Her boyfriend. And even though he said that he only liked her as a friend, if he really didn't want to be with her, he would have told her. They were going out for five years now, and something other than that must have lead Kairi and the rest of the girls to believe that he would actually propose to her. He said he likes her only as a friend, but sometimes even friends get very close to the borderline between friendship and relationship. I believe it's on that borderline.

I had just ruined her life by sleeping with her boyfriend, willingly I might add. The worst part of it is that he didn't seem to mind either. Was he not thinking? Or did he simply not care about her feelings? Did he not think of the consequences?

I picked up the phone that had snapped me out of thought and heard a cheery hello from the other side as my heart started to twist.

"Hey, Riku! I got great news for you!" Kairi said and I could almost hear her smile through the phone.

"Really?" I answered weakly.

"Yeah, I was able to get my private jet to fly over there to pick you up early! Mother had been using it all week, and yesterday Cloud and Leon had taken it out. They almost crashed it too… Cloud got a little too 'friendly' with Leon if you know what I mean in the pilot seat and I had to get the pilot to kick them out so we wouldn't have crashed." I let out a weak laugh. If they had crashed, it would have saved us the trouble of doing worse damage by ripping out her heart. "Leon has gotten better since the last time he flew the plane, Most likely all those video games." She giggled on the other side.

"So you think you can get to the airport by twelve?" She asked.

"Yeah…"

"Are you okay Riku? You sound-"

"I'm fine."

"Okay…" She said, sounding a bit dejected on the other side. "Well, anyways, I'll see you guys later!" She said with a happy tone again and hung up. I think my heart just fell out of my chest. I sighed as I heard the water get turned off in the bathroom where Sora must have been taking a shower. He started to hum a song as I heard him walk by the closed door and into a different room. How could he be so happy at a time like this? Was he really that dense?

"Riku! Breakfast is ready!" I heard him shout and I quickly opened the door and walked to the kitchen so he wouldn't have to go looking for me.

"Kairi called. She said she sent her private jet to pick us up at the airport at 12." I said, trying to get him to think of Kairi.

He had to think of her. He had to think of what was going to happen now. She would have to be told what happened and, like I had thought before, she would have her heart wrenched out. And then if I were to be able to ever get over the guilt, there would be no chance for us. I have so many problems that I could not place the burden on him. My real parents disowned me, my foster parents sometimes get annoyed by my insecurities and even Kairi, on the rare occasion, will tell me to stop sulking and get a life. He seemed to be able to handle them so far, but for how long could he hold on? I doubt for long, especially with me doubting the relationship, and myself.

"Mmhmm." That was his response. Was he trying to avoid the inevitable? Trying to avoid the fact that he would have to tell Kairi? I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. It would be best to leave it for when we got to Japan, so we could solve this problem face to face. Sora, Kairi, and me.

* * *

Japan, the one place I wanted and didn't want to be. I saw Kairi looking around for us in her little pink dress and her bright, vibrant eyes. And Sora was heading for the food court. And here was I, stuck in the middle. 

"Sora!" Kairi shouted and waved to him as she spotted him through the crowd before me. He took one last glance at the food court before greeting her. But there was no kiss, or even a hug. Just a simple hello that made Kairi's eyes darken just the tiniest bit with sadness. I shuffled my way towards them, not really wanting to be with both of them at the same time. I don't think I could bare it.

Is this human nature? To act without thinking, so you can regret it later?

"Hey Kairi," I said.

"Hey Riku!" She gave me a quick hug and stepped back with a smile on her face looking from Sora to me. "I'm starving! Let's go get some food!" She kept smiling at us as Sora quickly agreed and ran to the food court. God, why couldn't that plane have crashed?

"Come on silly, let's go." She poked me in the chest and I looked up from the floor at her. Her face turned to puzzlement as she must have seen the look on my face that screamed 'I need to talk to you.' Damn me and not being able to hide my emotions.

"Riku, what's wrong?" She said.

"It's nothing." I said meekly but Kairi kept staring at me. She called Sora's cell since he would not be able to hear her shouting at him from the food court.

"Sora? Yeah it's me. We'll be right there, I saw something and Riku offered to buy it for me." She nodded and closed her phone.

"Riku, what's wrong?" She asked and crossed her arms.

"I told you it's-"

"Don't give me that crap," she said. Shocked I stared at her. Was that Kairi? Or was there a pod person in there somewhere? She sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm just tired of complaining to everyone and not being able to do anything. I want to help."

"Kairi, I don't think you can help…" I trailed off and unconsciously glanced over at the food court. Kairi noticed though and looked around as her eyes fell on Sora.

"If it concerns Sora, I _will_ help," she said sternly.

"Kairi…"

"Spill it!"

"Fine! I slept with him, alright?" I snapped. Silence. I felt like I was in one of those movies where the scene is focused on two people and everyone else is just a blur. Kairi took a step back and said a quiet 'oh.' I stayed quiet and averted my eyes to the floor. Kairi closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, let it out, and opened her eyes. And to my surprise there was a smile on her face.

"We'll talk about this later. I was planning on having fun right now with you guys and I will. Especially now…" She trailed off and I put a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Kairi."

"No, I said we'll talk about this later. Right now… I want some tacos."

* * *

I sat in her living room with Leon and Cloud. She must have told them something, because they seemed uncomfortable with her and Sora in the next room. I can only guess what they are talking about. Cloud started to build a house out of playing cards. As he was about to put the roof on, Leon kicked it with his left combat boot, sending the cards flying. Earning a glare from Cloud, he collected them from the floor and started to build the house on the other side of the table. Leon put his foot on the table, getting a growl from the blonde, but Leon's boot didn't move. He just kept his foot on the table, lazily watching the blonde who was in deep concentration. 

I ruined Kairi's life. She was so happy before, and now I have destroyed it. Sora must have been happy too, if he was still in a relationship with her. Then I came along. Kairi sent me, trusting me, to pick up Sora and get him here. What do I do in return? I sleep with her boyfriend. I haven't heard the voice in a while, it muse be because I've taken over it's job of putting myself down. I deserve it. Is this my purpose in life? To ruin everyone else's? To bring everyone down with me because I am so bad at living? Pathetic and useless, I do not understand why I am still here. I let these good people - my friends - I let them down. I bring them into despair because I have so many pathetic problems.

I will eventually lose them all. Then I will be alone. The way it should be…the way it should have always been. That way I could have never hurt Kairi, the person who actually believed in me, and Sora who helped me let it all out. I repaid them with grief, I should only get the same. Grief and loneliness.

I stood up from the couch. I know what I must do. I must leave these good people, so that I will not burden them with any problems, or heart breaking decisions, or sacrifices. I will eventually get to that, but for now, I have to get out of this house.

As I started across the room, Leon peered at me from under his bangs.

"Hey, where are you…" Cloud turned to watch me leave, and his card house fell down. I exited the house into the cold rain and breathed deeply. I love the smell of rain.

I could barely see a few feet in front of me as I went down the street, people running through the rain with umbrellas or newspapers, trying to find shelter. I don't get it; people use water everyday, they even go to pools and in the ocean. So why is rain so different? I had a reason to get out of the rain though; I wanted to get home, lock myself in my room, and sleep. Then I could dream.

Nothing bad happens in my dreams.

I stopped at the corner of a block as the sign had a red hand telling me not to walk. I started to think about what I might do tomorrow when the light changed to the little white person walking. I started across the street when it happened. Two bright beams of light were seen from the very corner of my right eye since I couldn't see it from the left. I instinctively turned my head to the left to get a better view when the piercing noise of the horn made me cringe.

Then it hit me.

Literally.

* * *

HAH! Weren't expecting that were you? 

No, no, he's not dead, obviously. I mean ,then how could be be telling the story? I always think that's weird when the character dies but has been telling the story... because how are they telling the story? Besides, I wouldn't let Riku off **that** easily ;D Ah, and the angst, yes Riku has gone into full blown angst mode, or as close as I can get him for now.(cackles)

There needs to be some good solid AxelxRoxas fanfics... no I'm not crazy... no... my next story isn't about Axel...heheheh... So... who else beat the game:D

So... make AXENATOR happy and **review!** Tell her your thoughts, comments, constructive critisisms, threats, uhh... anything else you can think of. :D (I have never been in coach, I wonder how nice it is in there.. I get stuck in the plain seating-) (gets knocked out by random reader who wants me to stop talking about how cool planes are.)


	7. Chapter 7

Okay at first, this was gonna be the last chapter. And then I hated the ending and I rewrote it. But this isn't the last chapter. lol Then, Fanfiction wouldn't let me log in, and then it wouldn't let me update. :dies: so that's why it took so long. I think this chapter is rather... uh.. inspiring? in a sort of AXENATOR weird way that I wrote it.

Disclaimer: seriously, if I owned Kingdom Hearts... Axel and Roxas would have a whole separate story line like in COM's Riku's Side. Except it would be Axel and it would be of how they eventually get togehter at then end (somehow...even though if you saw the ending... well... yeah) and then make out... in the rain. But since that isn't the case I think you get the point.

* * *

I woke up, but I didn't open my eyes. I lay where I was - most likely a hospital - and listened to the noises around me. I didn't feel like being bombarded by questions from the doctors yet. Or any shrinks that would like to talk to me about my 'problem.' Obviously they must have seen the scars on my arms when they took me in, and it would be highly unlikely they were stupid enough to suspect the truck that hit me had done that.

I hadn't cut myself in a while actually. Actually not for about 3 days… actually I don't know what day it was. How long had I been in the hospital bed, passed out? Anyway, I hadn't done it in so long. I was used to it happening everyday.

Hearing that voice everyday. That doubting voice inside my head telling me how pathetic and stupid I was. It was like my conscious, except more like the 'bad twin.' I used to hear it when I was younger, but only on certain occasions. Like when I didn't do well on a simple spelling test, or I spilt milk. It's pretty common, I learned, for people to tell themselves they couldn't do something or to tell themselves they weren't trying hard enough. So I let the voice pester me. But soon, I started to listen to the voice more often than to myself, and soon all my thoughts centered around how much I hated myself. How bad I was at things, how people hated me, and then my parents disowned me… I squeezed my eyes tight, trying to not make myself feel bad for what I had done. Or the voice might eventually come back and I'd fall right back into that pit.

Can sins be forgiven?

Just as I thought it couldn't get any worse, I started to hear a hum. Not a hum of a machine, but of a person. It was a slow humming the person was doing, and after listening carefully, I assumed it was a man. It was gentle and soothing, and I relaxed and my eyes went back to just being closed instead of crushing my eye lids together. It reminded me of him, and how he actually cared. Sora _cared _about how I felt. He didn't say anything anyone else would say about my problem. He just stayed quiet and didn't try to prod too much, like a shrink would do. He didn't laugh at me when I cried, and he was kind enough to help me.

Or maybe it wasn't the fact that he was kind and felt like it was the right thing to do. Maybe he wanted to help, because he…

"Sora? This has been the third day I've found you here." I heard a floaty voice that sounded like a certain red head. The gentle humming stopped and I heard the fabric and body shift in a seat.

"But Kairi…" He sounded like a helpless child trying to ask for something from his mother. A heavy sigh was heard and a soft pitter patter meant that the redhead was coming over to where I lay.

"I know…you don't have to remind me." Her hasty voice came and Sora was quiet.

"I'm sorry Kairi…that it didn't work out…" He said after what seemed like forever to me. I should have just opened my eyes before; it would be awkward if I did so now.

"Sora, it's not your fault. I should have been more cautious. You can't tell when you are gonna fall for someone." Kairi said in a sad voice, and I could feel the tension start to thicken in the room. I wished that I was still asleep.

"But you fell pretty hard, Sora. I'm surprised you didn't break your nose or something." She said lightly, and I heard a small laugh come from Sora.

"Yeah, I guess I did." Then a strange rumbling came from somewhere in the room.

"Sora? Was that…you?" Kairi asked.

"No!" He said quickly, and then another gurgle came forward. "Okay…maybe I'm a little hungry…"

"Let's go get something to eat then. I'll pay." Kairi offered. I think she might go broke.

"Are you sure? You might go broke." I stopped a laugh before it became obvious that I was listening in on their conversation.

"No, I'm sure I won't." She answered and I heard the scampering of feet and the door swinging open.

"Last one down is a rotten egg!" He yelled, and I heard several nurses scolded him as he ran through the halls. I heard Kairi rise from her chair. But she didn't move.

"I'm giving you full responsibility, Riku. Just don't pull the leash too much or you won't have a happy Sora." She said, directly to me. "I'll put the flowers by your bed. Sora also brought you chocolate…but it seems he ate them while he was waiting. Don't worry though, I'm sure he'll bring more." She added and then she walked out of the room.

When I was sure she was gone, I opened my eyes. How did she know I was awake? I looked over at the table that was next to me and saw some sunflowers in a vase. Next to it was a box of what might have been chocolate, but there was nothing but wrappers in it. I lifted my hand slowly to see if it was able to move. When I figured out that I wouldn't break anything by moving it, I put my hand on my head and sighed.

Was Kairi that forgiving that she's 'giving' me Sora? What was it that she and Sora talked about behind those closed doors on that rainy day? I mulled over these and countless other questions that were forming in my head. I wondered if things would turn out okay between us; all three of us. Would me and Sora be able to hang around with Kairi, or would we have to be with her alone? I wanted to know that she was going to be able to recover from whatever damage I had done her. I rubbed my eyes in thought. But it's us that did it. Sora and I, I shouldn't blame myself only for it. So why do I continue to do that? I shouldn't put myself down all the time…problems might start up again. I made a mental note of my goal: get confident. It's a start I guess. I want to start it all over. I want a clean slate so I can get a better life.

Who knew that getting hit by a truck would bring about such a revelation?

Hearing footsteps, I closed my eyes again and put my hand back down. I still wanted to think, so I would just pretend to sleep.

"When did the doctor say he would get out?" My heart stopped. I swear it did. I resisted the urge to open my eyes and look over at who was my foster mother. What was she doing here?

"He said in a few weeks. Don't worry honey, I'm sure he'll be okay." I heard 'father' say as they entered the room and the clacking of 'mom's' high heels stopped next to my bed. They wanted to see me? I- I knew they liked me, but I had caused them so many problems in the past. I ran away from home a couple of times, started a fight in school, almost got suspended, didn't go to collage, had no job…there was no end to the problems I gave them. I was an extra wheel they kept, I thought, just so they could get a tax reduction. But they came to see me, because they were worried?

"Oh, he's sleeping." I heard her velvet laced voice drift through the air that was tinted with kindness.

"We should come back another time, then. It seems his friends already got him flowers. But if I remember correctly, he likes lilies." I heard a thud as most likely a vase was put on the table next to the sunflowers.

"But, I'm worried. He left home again without telling us…all the way to America. And when he gets back he gets hit by a truck because he was wandering the streets? Do you think we've done something wrong?" I so badly wanted to tell her that she didn't, but I continued to 'sleep' as the words threatened to burst my mouth open.

"Sweetheart, I'm not sure. But let's discuss this another time. We'll ask him if you want when he gets out of the hospital and is feeling better." A reassuring firm voice told her. "We don't want to push things on him when he's trying to recuperate from being run over."

"Okay…" She answered and it became silent. Then two small lips were placed on my forehead. "Sweet dreams, dear." I waited until I was sure they had left the room before I raised my hands to cover my face as I felt the tears start to form at the corner of my eyes.

Could my sins be forgiven?

It seems like they could. And I'll try my best for it.

* * *

Yeah, I think the next chapter may be the last one... depending on how I write it. 

Too tired from lacrosse to type anymore...

So leave me a **review** please! Tell me what you think, anything you want so you can help me help you read a better story! hehe! And also it would make me happy. **:D**


	8. Chapter 8

It's the end! Yes, I know you were all silently sittign there saying "Gosh, finally this crap is over!" (goes into long rant about I still don't like how I write angst and it's really hard and blah blah blah.)

I wrote this like 4 days ago but fanfiction was being a pain and wouldn't let me upload TT so anyways, its the end and obviously, I still don't own Kingdom Hearts. That was just the disclaimer for your infomation **:D**

**Warning: This is the end.** So, no more chapter after this one. This ending will prob leave yo ustaring at the screen like "Damnit why isn't ther going to be another chapter?" But I thought that well, I kind of wrote this story to show how Riku changed, from emotastic to... not as emo and a bit more socially, ya know? Ah, anyways, I hope you understand and like the ending :)

* * *

"Sora?" I asked, startling him from his almost afternoon nap.

"Huh? Wha?" He flailed his arms around to keep himself from falling off the chair. He steadied himself and grabbed another chocolate from the box he got for me. So far, I had eaten one, which was cherry so I spit it back out. Sora had eaten seven out of the ten in the box so far, leaving only two left for me. How thoughtful of him.

"If um, this is going to work out…" I said, still uneasy with the fact that I was actually Sora's boyfriend. After another visit from Kairi which took place when I was 'sleeping' she told me that if I decide to decline her offer of being with Sora she would beat the crap out of me because I would hurt Sora's feelings. I have never seen Kairi or heard of her fighting, but I know from previous encounters that women were not ones to be trifled with. So even though I was still uncomfortable with the idea, I had to readjust in case Kairi came by and expected us to be… kissing or something.

"Yeah?" He leaned forward and put his elbows on the bed followed by his head in his hands. He licked his lips clean of the chocolate and took a very long time in doing so. I was able to get my attention away from his lips to continue my line of thought.

"I want you to meet my parents. My foster ones. I don't want to keep secrets from them… I'm trying to turn my relationship with them around." I said, remembering when they first visited me at the hospital. Ever since then, I waited eagerly for them to come back. So far they came back one more time with lilies again, and I actually talked to them. Well, listened mostly to mother worrying over me and hugging me until I couldn't breathe and my father trying to pry her away so he could get at least one sentence in. I wanted to try to be something like that towards them. I had isolated myself away from them out of fear but they cared about me and I want to show that I care about them too.

"Well, it's not like it could be kept a secret anyways. Eventually one day they would find me on top of you on the kitchen table and they would definitely ask for an explanation." He grinned and popped another chocolate in his mouth. I think I'm going to make him buy me another one.

"And who says you'd be the one on top?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I do!" He answered and I poked him in his chest.

"I beg to differ. If I remember correctly, **I** was on top." I told him and received a pout.

"That was once! Things can change!" He crossed his arms over his puffed out chest, making him look utterly adorable. I kissed him lightly and smirked.

"You're right about that."

"So… I get to be seme?"

"No."

"Why not!" He groaned loudly, earning the attention of a nosy nurse. "Uh… why don't we go for a walk?" He said and smiled nervously as I laughed.

* * *

We stood at the gate of my house and Sora fidgeted next to me. 

"Riku, we're not going to levitate over there. Can you open the gate?" He asked me and I grumbled at him and took out my keys to unlock the gate. Didn't he realize that I was trying to build up the atmosphere?

We got up to the door and I paused again. Sora sighed and muttered something about being slower than a snail stuck in molasses and knocked on the door. To my surprise the door came flinging open and something launched itself at Sora.

"Isn't he such a cutie?" She exclaimed and she started to hug Sora and giggle.

"Uh, Miss my throat-"

"Don't call me 'miss' young man!" She let go of him and crossed her arms. "It makes me sound old!" I cracked a smile at her; she had always been a bit funny.

"What's this? My little Riku is smiling?" She turned towards Sora with an accusing look. "Where did you put my son?" Sora blinked and took a step back in surprise.

"I don't know what you're talking about mi- uh…" He held his hands up as he trailed off, not knowing my mom's name.

"It's-"

"Cookies!" Out burst what could have been mistaken as my biological father. The hair was the reason as it bounced along behind him as he held out a plate of warm chocolate chip cookies.

"Cookie?" Sora stared at my mom.

"No, I'm Nina." She picked up a cookie. "This is a cookie. I suggest you have one before I eat them all." She shoved the cookie in her mouth and grinned. Sora gaped at then glared at her as he grabbed all the cookies off the tray and stuffed them in his mouth. I could barely believe what I was watching.

"Riku," Mother turned to me with questioning eyes. "What was it that you wanted to tell us?"

"Come child! I have cake in the kitchen!" Father waved his arms above his head. Sora completely ignored his obvious weirdness and followed him into the house.

"Well, um, let's wait until Dad is done with baking." I answered and she nodded enthusiastically.

"I am starving!" She said and I followed her into the house. My house. It was strange how I had never called it home before. I had always just thought of it as where I lived or where I went when the dad was over. But now, it seems to have a better feel with the word 'home.'

We waited while Sora gobbled up all the food and technically had an eating contest with my mom.

"So, Riku, what was it that you wanted to tell us?" Mom asked as she leaned back in her chair at the table. Sora sat next to me, gnawing on some beef jerky as my dad started to ice another cake. The fridge is nothing but cakes and cookies.

"Uh…" I folded my hands in my lap and stared at them. I saw Sora glance at me from the corner of his eye.

"Come on dear." She smiled and leaned across the table to poke me in the chest. I twiddled my fingers in my lap and then I heard an exasperated sigh from next to me.

"Just so that I'm not 50 when Riku gets to talking," Sora put down his beef jerky and sat up in the chair. "Your son, Nina, is gay. I'm his bi lover and I would like to let you know I love him very much. Uh, that's it right Riku? Oh yeah and he loves me too- I hope." He added at the end and I sent a death glare at him. Thanks for the support, Sora.

"Of course I do moron!" I shot at him and crossed my arms. Then an ear piecing laugh came from in front of me so that then I uncrossed my arms to protect my ears.

"You thought I didn't know?" Mom snorted halfway through her laugh. "Dear, as soon as I laid my eyes on this cutie I knew you were gay. I mean, Sora does wear some tight pants." She giggled and Sora's face turned into a tomato.

"I do **not** wear tight pants! What does that have to do with anything?" He pouted and looked at me. "Riku, do I wear tight pants?"

"Do you really want me to answer?" I smirked as Sora groaned.

"Cake!" Dad set it down in front of me.

"Uh, were you not paying attention to the conversation?" Sora raised an eyebrow at dad who stared blankly at him.

"Cake for all!" He cackled and went to most likely retrieve milk from the fridge. I sighed and shook my head. At least this went better than I had expected.

* * *

"So, Riku, what are we gonna do now?" I looked down at the mass of chocolate hair that was lying on my shoulder. 

"What are you talking about?" I kicked my legs to keep the swinging bench on our back porch going. I looked back at the setting sun in the distance and brought a hand up to stroke his hair.

"Like, now that you told your parents and stuff, we're together right? Like officially now and everything? No more problems with you right?" He looked up at me. "Right?"

"Sora…I'm not sure about 'no more problems'. I still don't feel too well about this relationship thing…and Kairi, and what about everyone else? What about our future? Where are you going to live, here or in the U.S.? What about your parents? And what-" Sora put his finger up against my lips and sat up.

"What if this, and what if that; is that all you can think of?" He removed his finger from my lips and turned so his whole body was facing me. "That's your problem, you keep thinking too much of the future and worrying."

"But thinking ahead is important too-"

"But you think so much ahead that you worry! That's how you get problems. Riku, you gotta learn to live in the now, and leave the future to the future. Don't worry about the past either, because I know that's what you're doing." He caught me on that one, I was thinking a lot about what I had done in the past.

"The past is the past and you can't change it. But you can change the future. You have choices Riku to make your life the best it can be. That's why I'm here, because for once you stopped thinking and just did it. Literally too." He chuckled and I cracked a small smile. "Listen, if you ever start to think too much, I'll be here. You get those problems again or start facing new ones, I'll be right here to help you. I won't leave you okay?" He kissed me lightly and smiled.

"You promise?" I asked, wanting to make sure that this wasn't too good to be true.

"I promise." He said seriously, making me smile. He then came back with his goofy grin. "Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye." He imitated the words and fell off the bench when he pretended to stab a needle in his eye.

"Ow…" He got up from the ground and sat next to me again.

"What a pretty sunset." He remarked as he took a strand of my hair and absent mindedly started to twirl it around his fingers. I smiled and nuzzled his cheek.

"Yeah. It's a beautiful way to start a new beginning."

* * *

Yes, there we go, the end. See, I couldn't make it a very happy ending since, it was supposed to be angst. But I wanted a somewhat happy ending... so... crappy evil angst I hate you and... 

Oh yes, and thank you to all my readers and reviewers! Let me name my lovely reviwers so I can thank you :) (they are in no particular order just to let you know lol)

xcloudx, bob the builder, BloodMistress, Ryu Fanel, DemonSurfer, kyokomirror2010, kamui-2609, Darkness-Heart,Aunju Canaharu, TomiSama04,animegirl999, Dude, Taylor, -insert amusing name here-, FiresOfDeath, random fan...

and everyone else who read but didn't feel like reviewing. I'm pretty sure that's everyone...

Now I can devote my time to my AkuRoku fic, Green Dilusion. Because writing angst isn't my thing. Writing Romance/ humor is more fun **:D **(And I prob write better at it too, but I write bad at everything:attempts to act emo but fails:)

AXENATOR, out!


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